Friday, May 30, 2014

lay it down

I haven't posted on here because, well, I'm in a bit of a funk about Christine's adoption -- really just how slow it's progressing.  You'd think I  would've learned well with James' adoption that I have no control over this thing.  It's such an act of surrender -- of laying down my timelines, deadlines, and plans and trusting God's.  It's so hard sometimes.  

I honestly thought we'd be half way through our dossier by now, but we only just got our hands on our completed home study yesterday.  I've been saying for months that our home study is done -- and it essentially was.  Almost.  And then there was this delay or that delay.  The good news is that it. is. in. our. hands.  Now, we can truly pursue the dossier with gusto and start applying for matching grants to help fund this beast.  We're also going to do some fundraisers this summer that I'll post more about later.  We have so, so much to do.  I think part of my funk is that I don't want to do all this -- it's summer!  It's the time I usually recharge a bit for the next school year.  Isn't that so selfish of me?  Talk about ridiculous.  You'd think I'd be grateful to have such a purposeful goal to be working toward -- a reason to rise each day!  Each day, I have the privilege of hanging with our kids, having some fun with them, while also working toward the adoption of a sweet young woman who is waiting for us.  But, no.  I'm feeling worn out and discouraged.  It's ike I'm at the foot of a mountain staring up at it.  

This is when my faith in God comes in.  I trust Him.  I really, really do.  I know that in no time He'll have us over that mountain, one simple, small step at a time.  One foot in front of the other.  One form, one signature, one notarization, one dollar at a time.  I'm so grateful.  I do not know what I'd do without the clear knowledge that He's in control and He will make this happen.  

Hang in there, Christine.  We'll be there soon.  

How cool would it be for her to be with us by Christmas?   

One seriously bright spot is that it's officially summer and school's out!  The kids are roaming, the days are long, the mosquitos are biting, the grass is growing.  

I am so, so glad.  

Many trips were made to the most enormous puddle (we're talking up to their knees, folks!) in the pasture at the back of our neighborhood.  What were they visiting this puddle for each day?  

Frog eggs.  Thousands of them!   

Yes, a wagon full.

I don't know if you can tell, but are large, green masses/clumps of them.  That they would pick up in handfuls!  Even Payton and Avery were in on it!  Ick!

Look at this kid.  He is out. of. control. these. days.  He was so sad that preschool ended, but is so excited to return in the fall.  He'll go five days a week next year and then, sniff, go to kindergarten in 2015!  Can you imagine!?  I tear up just thinking of putting him on a school bus!

A 'walk' around the neighborhood with a few extra kids thrown in for good measure.

He's forever being dressed up by his sisters.  And is really up for just about anything.  

No words.

June is right around the corner and I feel good things are in store.  Adoption Mountain, you better watch out!


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